I know we’re already halfway through the month of April, but I still wanted to check in with my goals. I also wanted to talk about something that’s been on my mind, which is knowing when to say no to things.
I’m I have a hard time saying no sometimes, and I know my friends who are reading this are probably rolling their eyes or laughing, because I am notorious for cancelling plans in every one of my friend circles. But one thing I’ve reealized is, I say YES! to a lot of things even know that I’m probably not going to be able to commit to this project or attend that event. I always have this notion in the back of my mind that I can make it happen if I really try. Fast forward to the due date of said project or time of said event, after realizing that I’ve scheduled five things at one time, is when I have to come clean and this always makes me feel like a flake. Even when it all could have been avoided in the beginning with a simple, “I’m sorry, but I can’t.”
I’m actually not a fan of saying no to things simply because you don’t want to do them, they inconvenience you, or for other selfish reasons. I know it’s a mantra preached about a lot, but I believe that some times the things you aren’t in the best mood about can turn out to be the most fulfilling. I’m also not a fan of saying no to things simply because I’m an Introvert because I feel like after a while that becomes a crutch.
Sometimes you say YES! to things because they are non-negotiable, even if you’d much rather be doing something else. Sometimes, I have to say No, because as much as I want to do something, it isn’t going to be possible.
I realized I needed to take a step back when A. I had to cancel on a wedding invitation that I accepted and really wanted to go to, but knew for a long time that I probably wasn’t going to be able to, and B. When I was asked to write an article on a show that I haven’t seen and I almost accepted. It seemed perfectly reasonable to stay up late, watch the show and write the article, until reality hit. Having to decline these things make me feel like a bad friend and bad writer, but honesty is policy. There’s always a silver lining, as I’ll be able to support another friend in a pageant the weekend of the wedding and focus on other articles that need to be written.
I say all of this to say, the next time someone asks me to do or attend something, I’m going to think about two things in that moment: “Is this something I want to commit to?” (want, not feel. Feelings are fickle and can change within hours. Want is something that I would regret not committing to) and “Is it actually possible for me to commit to this?” (no more scheduling three things in one day) and give them an honest answer right then, even if that answer is No.
Do you have a problem saying No or Yes to things? I’d love to know how you deal in the comments below!
Okay, on to the goals. Here’s how I did in March.
Continue to work on Manuscript Edits, Polish 3rd Draft. Excited to say that I’ve done this! Working on the final draft now and couldn’t be more excited. Have a great time/learn from Madcap Retreats! I have nothing but good things to say about this retreat. Check out my recap here if you haven’t!!
Order an Ancestry DNA Kit– This is something that I keep putting off for some strange reason, although I really want to do it. Next month, for sure!
Revise Student Loan Plan-This too, I’m actually dreading this. Ugh, I hate student loans. But it must be done.
Make Eye Doctor/Dentist/Physical Appointments- Yikes! None of these either.
Didn’t do too hot in March, so I’m shooting for the moon in April:
Submit grant + writers residency applications: There are two grant and writers residencies I want to apply for this month! Wish me luck!
Go to Hilton Head: I should be going to Hilton Head, SC soon for a surprise that I cannot wait to fill y’all in on!
Meal Prep:I want all my meals prepped in Tupperware for the entire week. That way, there will be no excuse or reason to eat fast food.
Participate in #DVPit: I want to finish the final draft of my novel in time for #DVPit! (which is Monday) It’s basically a way for diverse authors to pitch agents, and I’m super excited about tit.
Re-Do Online Portfolio: I have a lot of new articles to add to my online portfolio and I kind of want to redo the whole thing. Does anyone have any ideas for this?
Submit all of my articles! My freelance writing gigs have been picking up (blessings!) and I need to make sure I stay on top of this to keep the momentum going.
Eye Doctor: I need new glasses and a check up. This has to get done.
Make a financial step (Pay off a credit card or revise student loan plan): Instead of trying to do all of the financially responsible things, I’m going to break them down in steps that don’t look so intimidating (progress, not perfection)
If you made it to the end of this post, I would love to hear your goals down below as well. Leave them in the comments! 🙂